jeffreymark

JAZZ RIP (2003-2011)

Lost Jazz my 8 year old Border Collie yesterday. Vet said she had an inner ear issue so deeply embedded that it finally took her down. Border collies characteristically display a toughness second to none in dogs. So, by the time their sickness shows it's really bad. She had a sweet disposition like no other dog I have owned. And, she tolerated my wife's punk Yorkie. She slept in my 8th grader's room every night. The Jeffreymark family will miss her greatly.

WHO CAN RESIST A YORKIE II

A couple of weeks ago I posted a piece, an honest confession if you will, about my secret love for Mrs. Jeffreymark's wussie Yorkie. I'm trying to maintain my composure. I want to be a man's man like Tom Selleck,but this damn Yorkie makes me feel a bit weak. Take a look at the newest outfit my wife's dog is sporting here. Some of you more manly types may know what a painful ordeal this dog puts me through. Following the photo of this wussie dog I have provided another photo for you to gaze at desperately hoping it aids you in restoring your public image. (Metro pussies take note: nothing will help you except a few good days out on the old Santa Fe Trail.)

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WHO CAN RESIST A YORKIE ?

I'm a man. Real men like big bruiser dogs such as German Shepherds, Border Collies, and Pit Bulls. Because I'm a man I complement my character with a man's dog. I own a Border Collie. She loves to run, jump, and chase Frisbees. This past sumer my wife rewarded her long hard road to becoming bilingual certified by purchasing a wussy dog, a Yorkie. I, being the macho man that I am, wanted no part in caring for this new addition. And that Yorkie fulfilled my worst nightmares. She rides in Mrs. Jeffrey Mark's Toyota like the bon-bon eating fat lady's mutt-hanging out the window, content in her Valley Girl role. (let the reader note: Mrs. JM is not a bon-bon eating fat lady) She sleeps in our bed. She sits on the finest furniture. She even eats yogurt treats so as to not lose her stunning figure. 

Yet, something has gone terribly wrong. I'm losing my grip. The dog got to me. She sits in my lap, and sleeps beside me. She gives me a high five. Not long ago this little helpless squirt developed staph infection from a bad haircut. I found myself helplessly descending down the bowels of fear. "She might die," I cried to myself. Such a gloomy prospect sent me to the prayer closet. "Please dear God," I plead in secret, "Don't let little Sophie die. She seems so helpless, so innocent. Oh dear God, I will be kinder, gentler, and more loving, but don't let Sophie die." 

My prayers ascended to the Almighty.  He spared our Sophie. I'm now filled with compassion for this little Yorkie. She taught me to love more faithfully and live more charitably. Take a look at the picture below. She's all decked out in her new Christmas do.  Who can resist this little cutie? Every man deserves a Yorkie. By the way, I now must iconically fix my eyes on Clint Eastwood photos simply to maintain my manly disposition.

PETS AND FULL MOON

Keep your pets in on a full moon night.

Injuries and illness among dogs and cats seems to be higher during full moon than at other times of the month, a new study finds. But researchers don't know why. The study, reported in the July 15 issue of the Journal of the American Veterinary Medical Association, finds emergency room visits for these pets increases during or near the full moon. In studying 11,940 cases at the Colorado State University Veterinary Medical Center, the researchers found the risk of emergency room visits to be 23 percent higher for cats and 28 percent higher for dogs on days surrounding full moons. The types of emergencies ranged from cardiac arrest to trauma.